Aapka bachcha aur chinta

Shayad zyaadatar subahein ek jaisi hoti hain. School se theek pehle pet mein dard uthta hai aur dopahar tak apne aap theek ho jaata hai. Sawaal kabhi khatm nahi hote, aur har jawab bas ek minute ka sukoon deta hai. Gate par aansoo, aur woh nanha haath jo chhootne ka naam nahi leta. Jab tak aap kaam par pahunchte hain, aap pehle se thake hote hain, aur thoda is baat ki bhi chinta rehti hai ki log kya sochenge.

Pehli baat jo jaanna zaroori hai, woh yeh hai. Dar bachchon ki sabse aam mushkilon mein se ek hai, na koi anokhi baat aur na aapke bachche ki shararat. Duniya bhar mein lagbhag har pandrah mein se ek bachcha ya kishor is tarah ke lagatar dar ke saath jeeta hai. Aapka bachcha akela nahi hai, aur na aap.

Sirf ek doctor ya prashikshit visheshagya hi bata sakte hain ki asal mein kya ho raha hai, aur yeh kitaab aapke bachche par koi label nahi lagati. Aaj aap jo kar sakte hain, woh isse aasaan bhi hai aur utna hi asardaar bhi: is pattern ko pehchaniye, aur uska saamna thode aur shaant mann se karna shuru kijiye.

Is baat mein sachmuch raahat hai ki iska ek dhaancha aur ek naam hai jise visheshagya achchi tarah samajhte hain, aur aisi saaf, parkhi hui baatein hain jo madad karti hain. Aapko akele andaze lagate hue isse nahi guzarna hai. Baaki ki yeh kitaab aapko batati hai ki dar asal mein hai kya, aapka bachcha uske neeche kya mehsoos karta hai, aur ghar par woh chhote kadam kaun-se hain jo sabse bada farak laate hain.

Ise ek aise alarm ki tarah sochiye jo had se zyaada naazuk par set hai. Dare hue bachche mein dimaag ka jo hissa khatra bhaanpta hai, woh bahut aasani se aur bahut zor se baj uthta hai, tab bhi jab darne ki koi baat nahi hoti. Dar aapke bachche ke liye asli hai, bhale hi khatra asli na ho. Isliye bachna, mana karna, aansoo aur woh na khatm hone wale sawaal, ye sab us alarm ka apna kaam karna hai, na ki bachche ka jaan-boojh kar zindagi mushkil banana.

Aur yeh aapki wajah se nahi hua. Is tarah ka dar kai cheezon ke mel se badhta hai: bachche ka janmjaat swabhaav, uske jeevan ke anubhav, aur parivaar ka itihaas. Yeh aapki kisi galti ka nateeja nahi hai. Khud ko dosh dene se kisi ka bhala nahi hota, aur yeh sahi bhi nahi hai.

Jo bachcha swabhaav se satark ya sharmila hai, jo party mein peechhe-peechhe rehta hai aur ghulne-milne mein kaafi waqt leta hai, uske dare hue bachche mein badalne ki gunjaish thodi zyaada hoti hai. Lekin swabhaav hi bhaagya nahi hai. Bachpan mein satark hona bachche ka bhavishya tay nahi kar deta. Parivaar us dar ke saath kaise pesh aata hai, isse raah kaafi badal sakti hai, aur yeh sachmuch ummeed jagane wali baat hai.

Do baaton ko ek saath thaame rakhna madad karta hai. Jo vyavhaar aapko kheejh dilata hai, woh "mujhse nahi hoga", woh lipatna, woh sapaat "nahi", yeh dar bol raha hai. Yeh avagya nahi hai, aur yeh aapke pyaar ya aapki parvarish par koi faisla nahi hai.

Sochiye ki dar ek chhote-se shareer ke andar kya karta hai. Dil tez ho jaata hai. Seena kas jaata hai. Pet marodne lagta hai. Mann aage bhaagta hai, ek ke baad ek sabse buri kahani bunta jaata hai. Yeh bachche ka naatak karna nahi hai. Yeh ek asli shaaririk haalat hai, theek waisi hi jaisi aapka apna shareer tab banata hai jab aap sachmuch darte hain, bas yeh un baaton par chaalu ho jaati hai jo asal mein khatarnaak nahi hain.

Lipatna, sawaal, woh "mujhse nahi hoga", ye surakshit mehsoos karne ki koshishein hain, na ki aap par kaabu paane ki. Aur yahaan pech hai. Daraawni cheez se bachne par jhat raahat milti hai, aur theek isiliye dar baar-baar aur bhi taaqatwar hokar lautta hai. Har baar jab aapka bachcha dar wali cheez se bach nikalta hai, alarm yeh seekh leta hai ki bachna zaroori tha, aur agli baar aur zor se bajta hai.

Yehi wajah hai ki baar-baar tasalli dena ek jaal ban jaata hai. Wohi chinta beesvi baar door karna achcha lagta hai, aur bachcha ek pal ke liye shaant bhi ho jaata hai. Par woh shaanti kabhi tikti nahi, kyunki tasalli chupke se dimaag ko sikha deti hai ki haalat sachmuch khatarnaak thi aur bachaye jaane ki zaroorat thi. Dar laut aata hai, ek aur khuraak maangta hai, aur phir ek aur.

Bachche aksar inmein se kuch bhi shabdon mein nahi keh paate. Ek foot padna, pet ka dard, ya ek sapaat "nahi", shayad yehi ekmaatra tareeka hai jisse dar bol paata hai. Jab aapko vyavhaar ke neeche chhipa dar dikhne lagta hai, to dheeraj rakhna kahin aasaan ho jaata hai, aur aapka dheeraj aapke paas maujood sabse kaam ki cheezon mein se ek hai.

Shuruaat khud se kijiye. Shaant maa-baap ek ghabraye bachche ko tikne mein madad karte hain, isliye sudhaarne se pehle judiye. Jab aapka bachcha dar mein dooba ho, to woh soch ya samajh nahi paata. Aapki sthir aawaz, aapki dheemi saans, aapka shaant shareer, ye kisi bhi chatur baat se zyaada kaam karte hain. Pehle bhaavna ke saath khade hoiye. Hal toofan ke guzar jaane ke baad nikalta hai, uske beech mein nahi.

Phir, dheere-dheere aur narmi se, chhoti-chhoti riyaayatein kam kijiye. Har baar jab poora parivaar dar ke ird-gird jhukta hai, school chhudwana, wohi chinta bees baar door karna, bachche ko apne bistar mein sulana taaki pareshani na ho, yeh chupke se dar ko khuraak deta hai. Rozmarra ki jo takleef dar deta hai, uska bada hissa parivaar ka yehi jhukna chalata hai. Ise kam karke aap berahmi nahi kar rahe. Aap apne bachche ko uski apni taaqat lauta rahe hain.

Asli baat hai sahara dena, bachana nahi. Bachana daraawni cheez ko hata deta hai; sahara dena aapke bachche ko uska saamna karne mein madad karta hai, jabki aap paas khade rehte hain. Shaant bharosa dikhaiye ki woh mushkil palon ko sambhal sakta hai: "Main jaanta hoon yeh daraawna lagta hai, aur main jaanta hoon ki tum yeh kar sakte ho, aur main yahin hoon." Ek baar mein ek chhota bahadur kadam uthaiye, koi badi chhalaang nahi, aur sirf nateeje ki nahi, koshish ki tareef kijiye. Jis bachche ne koshish ki aur ladkhadaya, usne bhi koshish to ki, aur yehi jashn manane ki baat hai.

Yahaan saboot mazboot hain. Bachche ke liye vyavasthit therapy, aur maa-baap ke aguvai wale tareeke jo riyaayatein kam karte hain, dono sachmuch sudhaar laate hain, aur akele maa-baap ki madad karna utna hi asardaar ho sakta hai jitna seedhe bachche ka ilaaj karna. Aap ghar par jo karte hain, woh sachmuch maayne rakhta hai.

Aap khaali pyaale se kisi ko nahi pila sakte. Maa-baap ka tanaav aur thakan asli hai aur bilkul swaabhaavik hai jab aap ek dare hue bachche ke saath jee rahe hon. Aapka apna aaram aur sahara ilaaj ka hissa hai, koi aisho-aaram nahi jise aapko kamana pade. Ek thaka hua maa ya baap shaant nahi reh paata, aur shaanti hi woh cheez hai jo aapke bachche ko sabse zyaada chahiye.

Yeh bhi dhyaan rakhiye ki dar chupke se poore ghar ko apne hisaab se na badal de. Yeh aasaan hai ki parivaar ka schedule, ghoomna-firna, yahaan tak ki baatcheet bhi, dheere-dheere ek bachche ke dar ke ird-gird jhuk jaaye, aur bhai-behen khud ko kinare kiya hua mehsoos karein. Parivaar tab sabse achcha chalta hai jab woh ek shaant team ki tarah milkar dar ka saamna kare, na ki ek bachcha banaam baaki sab.

Apne khud ke dar ko bhi narmi se aur bina sharm ke dekhiye. Dar ek peedhi se doosri tak ja sakta hai, aur bachche hamare chehre bahut gaur se padhte hain, isliye maa-baap ka apna sthir, bahadur saamna karna sabse taaqatwar sabkon mein se ek hai. Aapko nidar hone ki zaroorat nahi hai. Aapko bas apne bachche ko, rozmarra ke chhote tareekon se, yeh dikhana hai ki daraawni bhaavnaon ka saamna kiya ja sakta hai aur unhein jhela ja sakta hai.

Aur bojh baantiye. Jeevansaathi ko, kisi bharosemand rishtedaar ko, ya apne bachche ke school ko saath lijiye, taaki yeh saara bhaar kisi ek insaan par na pade. Bharat mein, saath dene wala parivaar yahaan ek sachchi taaqat hai, iska istemaal kijiye. Ek dada ya naana jo yojna samajhte hon, ek mausi ya chachi jo ek shaam sambhal le, ek shikshak jo jaanta ho ki chhodte waqt hangama nahi karna, ye sab aapka bojh halka karte hain aur aapke bachche ko sthir rakhte hain.

Kisi doctor ya baal maansik swaasthya visheshagya se milna tab sahi hai jab dar aapke bachche ko school jaane, sone, khaane, dost banane, ya saamaanya paarivaarik jeevan mein shaamil hone se rok de, ya jab woh hafton se bana ho aur apne aap kam na ho raha ho. Jaldi madad maangna koi zaroorat se zyaada pratikriya nahi hai. Yeh un samajhdaar kaamon mein se ek hai jo koi maa ya baap kar sakte hain.

Aur madad sachmuch kaam karti hai. Baatcheet wali therapy pehli pasand aur achchi tarah parkha hua ilaaj hai, aur yeh bahut saare bachchon ki madad karti hai. Kabhi-kabhi doctor ek shreni ke taur par dawa ki baat bhi kar sakte hain, har maamle ko soch-samajhkar taulte hue, par yeh aisi baatcheet hai jo kisi visheshagya ke saath honi chahiye, kabhi bhi apne aap uthaya gaya kadam nahi. Parivaar jitni jaldi sahara paata hai, haalaat aam taur par utne hi behtar hote hain.

Ek haalat aisi hai jis par ek alag tarah ke dhyaan ki zaroorat hoti hai. Agar aapka bachcha kabhi yeh baat kare ki woh yahaan nahi rehna chahta, ki woh khud ko chot pahunchana chahta hai, ya gayab ho jaana chahta hai, to ise gambheerta se lijiye aur paas bane rahiye. Use akela mat chhodiye, kisi bhi khatarnaak cheez ko narmi se uski pahunch se hataiye, aur usi din madad ke liye haath badhaiye. Bachche ke ye shabd hamesha kuch karne ke laayak hote hain, tab bhi jab aapka ek hissa ummeed karta hai ki uska yeh matlab nahi tha.

Aap Tele-MANAS ko 14416 par kisi bhi waqt, din ho ya raat, phone kar sakte hain, poore Bharat mein muft maansik swaasthya sahaayta ke liye, aapki apni bhaasha mein. Kisi turant ki aapaat sthiti mein, nazdeeki aspataal jaaiye. Madad maangna taaqat ki nishani hai, naakami ki nahi, aur yeh un sabse bahadur baaton mein se ek hai jo koi maa ya baap ek dare hue bachche ke liye karke dikha sakte hain.