The For You Series
NeurodivergenceADHD wale dimaag ke saath jeena
Ek shaant guide, us dimaag ke liye jo tez chalta hai aur jaldi bhool jaata hai, aur jo sahi intezaam milte hi kamaal ki cheezein kar sakta hai.
Aapka dhyaan alag tarah se kaam karta hai
ADHD wala dimaag na to aalsi hota hai, na kharab. Yeh dilchaspi par chalta hai, isliye sahi intezaam, zyada ichhashakti se kahin zyada maayne rakhta hai.
Shayad aapse kaha gaya ho ki aap laaparwah hain, ya bas aapko dhyaan lagana hai. Aapne pehle hi bahut koshish ki hogi. Wo mehnat sachi thi. Bas salah galat thi.
ADHD wala dimaag apna dhyaan usi par deta hai jo dilchasp, zaroori ya naya lage. Boring kaamon par, chahe wo kitne hi zaroori kyun na hon, maangne par dhyaan dena iske liye mushkil hota hai. Yahi wajah hai ki aap apni pasand ki kisi cheez par ghanton padh sakte hain, phir do minute mein nipatne wala ek bill bhool jaate hain.
ADHD dhyaan ke kaam karne ke tarike mein ek asli, maana hua farq hai. Yeh koi daur nahi hai, aur na hi koi kamzori. Yeh aksar bade hone ke baad bhi bana rehta hai, aur jitna log sochte hain usse kahin zyada aam hai.
- Dilchaspi, jaldi aur nayapan dhyaan ko tezi se kheench lete hain.
- Feeke, baar-baar wale kaam ko kamzor kheench milti hai, chahe wo maayne rakhein.
- Jawab zyada dabaav nahi hai. Jawab hai shuruaat ko aasaan banana.
Aur jaanna chahein to
Samay bhi ajeeb lag sakta hai. Ek das minute ka kaam aur ek do ghante ka kaam, shuru karne tak ek jaise lag sakte hain. Door ki koi deadline jhoothi si lagti hai, phir achanak wo kal aa jaati hai. Ise kabhi-kabhi time blindness kehte hain. Samay ko wahan rakhna madad karta hai jahan aapki aankhein use dekh sakein.
Yeh ek baar, zor se kahiye: mera dhyaan gayab nahi hai, yeh chun-chunkar lagta hai. Ab aaj ki kisi ek cheez par gaur kijiye jisne aapka dhyaan aasani se bandhe rakha. Wo aapke dimaag ka kaam karna hai, naakaam hona nahi.
Aam salah kabhi kaam kyun nahi aayi
"Bas aur koshish karo" isliye naakaam hoti hai kyunki koshish kabhi masla thi hi nahi. Masla shuru karna hai, aur shuru karna aasaan banaya jaa sakta hai.
Sana 31 saal ki hain aur Hyderabad ke ek school mein padhati hain. Saalon tak unhein laga ki wo bas boring kaamon mein kamzor hain. Wo copiyan jaanchne baithtin, aur kisi tarah poori shaam gayab ho jaati. Unke gharwale kehte ki unmein anushasan ki kami hai. Unhonne yeh baat maan li.
Asal mein jo ho raha tha wo yeh hai. ADHD wale dimaag mein boring kaamon ke liye shuru karne ka sanket kamzor hota hai. Ek dimaagi rasayan hai dopamine, jo aapko kaam shuru karne aur usmein tike rehne mein madad karta hai. Yeh inaam jaisi lagne wali cheezon ke liye aasani se aata hai aur feeki lagne wali cheezon ke liye dheere-dheere. To kaam isliye nahi ruka rehta ki aapko parwah nahi hai. Use shuru karna mushkil hota hai kyunki "chalo" ki aawaz dheemi rehti hai.
Kai bhartiya gharon mein faisla jhat se suna diya jaata hai: bas dhyaan lagao, bas baitho, apne us bhai ko dekho jo top aaya. Wo faisla asli baat se chook jaata hai. Hal zyada dabaav nahi hai. Hal hai shuruaat ko zordaar banana.
Saalon tak mujhe laga ki main aalsi hoon. Main aalsi nahi thi. Mera shuru karne ka sanket bas dheema tha.
Sana, 31
Aur jaanna chahein to
Yahi wajah hai ki ichhashakti chuk jaati hai aur achha intezaam nahi chukta. Ichhashakti ek battery ki tarah hai; yeh din bhar mein khatm hoti jaati hai. Intezaam ek ramp ki tarah hai; yeh tab bhi kaam karta hai jab aap thake hon. Jab aap apni mehnat ko dosh dena chhodkar shuruaat ko badalna shuru karte hain, to wahi dimaag jo "dhyaan nahi laga paata tha", kahin zyada kaam kar leta hai.
Wo kaam chuniye jise aap taalte aa rahe hain. Ek sticky note par sirf uska pehla do-minute wala kadam likhiye. Poora kaam nahi. Bas pehla chhota kadam.
Kamre ka intezaam kijiye, apni ichhashakti ka nahi
Aap kahan aur kaise kaam karte hain, ismein kiye chhote badlaav, zyada dhyaan lagane ke bade waadon se behtar kaam karte hain. Jo karna chahte hain, us tak sabse aasaan raasta banaiye.
ADHD wale dimaag ke zyadatar log tab behtar karte hain jab agla kadam saaf, saamne, aur chhota ho. Kaam tak ka raasta chhota rakhiye, aur dhyaan bhatkane wali cheez tak ka raasta lamba.
- Kaam ko itna chhota todiye ki pehla kadam do minute ka ho.
- Zaroori cheez ko saamne rakhiye. Aankh se ojhal, man se ojhal.
- Chhote tukde ke liye timer lagaiye. Mushkil hissa shuru karna hai.
- Kisi ke saath baithkar kaam kijiye, chahe phone call par hi kyun na ho.
Ismein kuch bhi beimani nahi hai. Seedhiyon ke bagal mein bana ramp beimani nahi hai; yeh is baat ka samajhdaar jawab hai ki shareer kaise chalta hai. Ye aapke dhyaan ke chalne ke tarike ke liye ramp hain.
Aur jaanna chahein to
Kisi par raay banane se pehle use ek hafta aazmaiye. Agar koi tarkeeb aap par fit na baithe, to use bina kisi guilt ke chhodiye aur doosri aazmaiye. Aap kisi feeke kaam ko kisi pasand ki cheez ke saath bhi jod sakte hain, jaise gaane ya chai ka ek cup. Maqsad aisa intezaam hai jo aapke sabse bure din kaam kare, sirf sabse achhe din nahi.
Ek aisa kaam chuniye jise aap baar-baar taalte hain. Das minute ka timer lagaiye aur sirf wahi kijiye, phir chahein to ruk jaiye. Aap shuru karna seekh rahe hain, aur yahi wo hunar hai jo sabse zyada maayne rakhta hai.
Aurtein aur ADHD
Aurton aur ladkiyon ko aksar saalon tak pehchana nahi jaata, kuch isliye ki wo ise chhipana seekh leti hain. Andekha reh jaane ka matlab yeh nahi ki wo kabhi tha hi nahi.
Lambe samay tak ADHD par zyadatar bechain chhote ladkon mein hi padhai hui, to iski shaant tasveer andekhi reh gayi. Kai aurtein bahar se hyperactive nahi hotin. Sangharsh andar hota hai: ek daudta dimaag, samay ka hisaab kho jaana, ek mez jo kabhi saji nahi rehti, saath bane rehne ki ek lagatar koshish jo kisi ko nahi dikhti.
Ladkiyon ki aksar achhi aur shaant hone ke liye tareef hoti hai, to wo chhipana seekh jaati hain. Wo jee-jaan se koshish karti hain, baar-baar maafi maangti hain, aur sharm ko akele dhoti hain. Aurton ko aksar bahut baad mein pehchana jaata hai, kabhi-kabhi tabhi jab unke apne bachche ki jaanch hoti hai. Tab tak wo saalon yahi maanti hui guzaar chuki hoti hain ki galti unki thi.
Kai bhartiya parivaron mein ek aurat se ummeed ki jaati hai ki wo ghar chalaye aur sabke liye sab kuch yaad rakhe. Wo bojh ek bina sahaare wale ADHD dimaag ko aur bhaari bana deta hai, aur us thakaan ko kamzori samajh liya jaata hai. Yeh kamzori nahi hai. Yeh ek bina sahaare wala dimaag hai jo ek saath do poore kaam kar raha hai.
Aur jaanna chahein to
Agar yeh aapki baat hai, to der se pehchan ek ajeeb sa dukh la sakti hai: wo saare saal, wo saari mehnat, aur iska naam ab jaakar mila. Wo dukh jayaz hai. Yeh raahat ki shuruaat bhi ho sakta hai. Is kitaab ke auzaar aapka ling chahe jo ho, kaam karte hain. Aap naakaam nahi ho rahi thin. Aap chadhai par bhaag rahi thin, aur kisi ne aapko bataya hi nahi tha ki wahan ek pahaad hai.
Ek aisi baat likhiye jiske liye aap khud ko dosh deti aayi hain, jo shayad asal mein ek bina sahaare wala ADHD dimaag ho. Use padhiye. Gaur kijiye ki kya wo ab kamzori se kam aur intezaam ki dikkat se zyada lagti hai.
Asal mein kya madad karta hai
Madad sach mein maujood hai, aur ise chunna aapka haq hai. Roz ke intezaam, baatcheet wali therapy, aur dawa, sab madad karte hain. Dawa ek vikalp hai, iklauta nahi.
Aapko yeh akele, ya ek hi baar mein theek nahi karna hai. Badon mein ADHD ke liye, jo cheezein madad karti hain wo aam taur par saath milkar sabse achha kaam karti hain.
- Roz ke intezaam jo shuru karne ki mehnat kam karte hain.
- Coaching ya therapy jo dincharya aur khud se ek narm aawaz banati hai.
- Dawa, kuch logon ke liye, jo dhyaan chaalu karna aasaan bana sakti hai.
Dawa kai badon ke liye ek sahi aur asardaar chunaav hai. Yeh koi naitik haar nahi hai, aur na hi yeh har kisi ke liye hai. Yeh aap par fit baithti hai ya nahi, yeh aapke aur ek doctor ke beech ka sawaal hai. Ek alag Weave guide batati hai ki ise kaise taula jaaye. Manochikitsak se milna paagalpan nahi hai; yeh bas jaankari hai.
Tez bhavnaayein bhi aksar ADHD wale dimaag ke saath aati hain: aise jazbaat jo jaldi aate hain aur gehri chot karte hain. Chinta, udaas man, aur tooti hui neend iske saath-saath chal sakti hain. Iska matlab yeh nahi ki aapmein kuch gadbad hai. Is library mein udaas man aur neend ke liye naram guide maujood hain.
Yaad rakhiye
Ek achha doctor aapko bas ek goli aur ek naam thama nahi deta. Wo aapki poori zindagi dekhta hai: kaam, neend, paisa, rishte, baaki sehat. Ilaaj ek baatcheet hai jo samay ke saath badalti rehti hai, ek baar ka faisla nahi.
Ek sawaal likhiye jo aap apne dhyaan ke baare mein kisi doctor se poochhna chahein. Use apne phone mein rakhiye. Sawaal taiyaar hone se pehli mulaqat kahin aasaan ho jaati hai.
Jo dimaag aapke paas hai, uske saath naram hona
Aapne saalon khud par sakhti ki hai. Sabse bada badlaav yeh hai ki apne dimaag ko alag samajhiye, kharab nahi.
Sana ne chhote se shuru kiya. Wo ek baar mein das minute copiyan jaanchtin. Unhonne ek dost ko bataya, jo samajhdaar nikla. Unhonne khud ko aalsi kehna band kar diya. Kuch hafte copiyan phir bhi jama hoti rahin. Par unke apne sir ke andar ki sakhti dheemi pad gayi, aur isne baaki sab kuch badal diya.
ADHD wale dimaag ke saath aksar asli taaqatein bhi aati hain: jo aapko bandh le us par gehra dhyaan, tez khayal, oorja, aur cheezon ke beech aise rishte dekh lena jo baaki log chook jaate hain. Khud se waise baat kijiye jaise aap ek achhe dost se karte jo jee-jaan se koshish kar raha ho. Is list mein yahi sabse kaam ki baat hai.
Jo dimaag feeke kaam par atak jaata hai, wahi apni pasand ki cheez par bahut door tak jaa sakta hai.
Aur jaanna chahein to
ADHD wale dimaag ke saath taraqqi koi seedhi lakeer nahi hoti. Kuch hafte intezaam tike rehte hain, kuch hafte bikhar jaate hain. Yeh iski banaawat hai, naakami nahi. Jo madad kare use rakhiye, jo hafte na chalein unhein maaf kar dijiye, aur phir se shuru kijiye, yeh bhaashan diye bina ki aapko behtar karna chahiye tha. Phir se, narmi ke saath shuru karna, yahi poora hunar hai.
Aapke saath
Agar yeh sab kabhi "main ab aur nahi kar sakti" tak pahunch jaaye, to wo ehsaas aam hai aur us tak pahuncha jaa sakta hai, yeh kamzori nahi hai. Neeche diya gaya crisis card aise logon se jodta hai jin tak aap kabhi bhi pahunch sakte hain.
Aaj raat, ek cheez ka naam lijiye jo aapke dimaag ne aaj achhi ki, chahe wo kitni hi chhoti ho. Use likh lijiye. Ek hafte tak aisa kijiye, aur dekhiye ki aapke sir ke andar ki aawaz ka kya hota hai.
Yeh jaankari kahan se hai
Aur padhne ke liye
Yeh guide samajhne mein madad karti hai. Yeh nidaan nahin hai. Uske liye doctor se milein.