Aapka bhai ya behen aur ghabrahat

Jab ghar ka ek insaan ek badi, har waqt bani rehne wali chinta dhota hai, to yojnaayein usi ke hisaab se mudne lagti hain. Safar chhote ho jaate hain ya radd. Kuch ghanton mein kamre chup pad jaate hain. Sab log thoda-thoda nazar rakhne lagte hain ki uski agli lehar kab aayegi. Shayad aapne wah din note bhi nahi kiya jab yeh shuru hua. Bas aapko pata hai ki ghar ki shakl badal gayi.

Isi sabke beech, aap kahin ek aisi bhoomika mein phisal gaye jo aapne kabhi sach mein chuni nahi thi. Wo jo shaant rehta hai. Jo museebat mein aur museebat nahi jodta. Jo cheezon ko itna sehaj rakhta hai ki kuch bhi us dar ko na chhede. Kisi ne aapko bithaakar yeh zimmedaari nahi saunpi. Aapne bas ise utha liya, jaise bade ya zyada tike hue bhai-behen aksar utha lete hain.

Kai Bhaartiya gharon mein yeh baat ankahi reh jaati hai. Aapke maata-pita apni saari oorja us bhai ya behen mein laga dete hain jo saaf dikhne wali takleef mein hai, aur aap chupchaap apne aap ko sambhalna seekh lete hain. Isliye nahi ki kisi ne aapki parwaah karna chhod diya, balki isliye ki aap theek-thaak lagte the, aur chinta baantne ke liye bas utni hi thi.

Yeh kitaab aapko yeh nahi bata sakti ki aapke bhai ya behen ko kya hai. Wah sirf ek doctor hi keh sakte hain, aur yeh kisi par yahan koi label nahi lagaayegi. Yeh jo kar sakti hai wah yeh hai ki aap us pattern ko samajh paayein jiske andar aap ji rahe hain, taaki wah kam uljha hua aur kam akela mehsoos ho.

Is jhukaav ko dekh lena bewafai nahi hai. Ise saaf-saaf dekhna hi pehla imaandaar kadam hai, zyada mazboot zameen par khade hone ki taraf, unke liye bhi aur aapke liye bhi.

Bhaari, had se zyada chinta aapke bhai ya behen ka naatak karna, ya kamzor hona, ya dhyaan ka bhookha hona nahi hai. Yeh is waqt unke dimaag aur shareer ke dar ke sanketon ko sambhalne ka tareeka hai. Jo alarm hamein bachaane ke liye bana hai, wah unke liye oonchi awaaz par atak gaya hai, aur wah tab bhi bajta hai jab kamre mein koi khatra nahi hota.

Is tarah ki chinta parivaron mein utni hi chalti hai jitna zyadatar log sochte nahi. Kisi kareebi rishtedaar ka iske saath jeena, parivar ke baaki logon mein iski gunjaish thodi badha deta hai. Ise dhyaan se padhiye: ek badhi hui gunjaish, koi pakki baat nahi, aur koi shraap nahi. Iska yeh matlab nahi ki aapke saath bhi wahi hoga.

Kyunki yeh aanshik roop se dimaag ki banawat hai, aapka bhai ya behen ise bas zyada koshish karne ka faisla karke band nahi kar sakte, theek waise hi jaise ve bukhaar ko ichha se bhaga nahi sakte. Yahi wajah hai ki "bas relax kar lo" ya "itna mat socho" lagbhag kabhi madad nahi karta, aur aksar unhein iske saath aur akela mehsoos karaata hai.

Beemari ko insaan se alag karna sabse dayaalu cheezon mein se ek hai jo aap kar sakte hain, aap dono ke liye. Wah jhallaana, wah bachna, wah baar-baar jaanchna aur phir se jaanchna, yeh chinta ki awaaz hai. Yeh uske neeche chhipa aapka bhai ya behen sach mein jo hain, wah nahi hai.

Aur yahan usi baat ka ummeed wala aadha hissa hai. Kyunki yeh sach hai, aur shareer se judi hai, aur aam hai, isliye iska ilaaj bhi hota hai. Jo cheez itni acche se samjhi hui hai, usmein doctor madad karna jaante hain, aur yahi wajah hai ki ise chhipaane ki jagah naam dena kaam ka hai.

Kisi maansik sehat ki samasya ke saath ji rahe insaan ke bhai-behen aksar ek chhipa hua bojh uthaate hain. Aap unki taraf se baat sambhaalte hain. Aap unhein shaant karte hain. Aap un rishtedaaron ko unke baare mein samjhaate hain jo samajhte nahi. Aap chupchaap uske liye taiyaar rehte hain jo aane wale saal la sakte hain. Ek shodh ne hazaaron bhai-behnon ke anubhav ikatthe kiye aur paaya ki yeh wazan saccha hai, aur sabke liye ise na dekhna aasaan hai, us bhai ya behen ke liye bhi jo ise dho raha hai.

Aap khud ko zaroorat se zyada madad karte, apni yojnaayein badalte, lagataar bharosa dilaate, ya dabe paanv chalte hue pa sakte hain taaki kuch bhi us dar ko na chhede. Yeh ek swaabhaavik, pyaar bhara jawab hai. Par ek baat jaanne layak hai: jab yahi poora pattern ban jaata hai, to yeh chinta ko ghataane ki jagah chupchaap badha sakta hai, kyunki dar ko yeh seekhne ka mauka hi nahi milta ki cheezein asal mein theek hain.

Aise ghar mein tulna dono taraf se chubhti hai. Kuch din aapko lagta hai ki aapko hi aasaan wala hona hai, wo baccha jo kabhi koi museebat nahi khadi karta. Doosre din aapko lagta hai ki koi aapko dekh hi nahi raha, kyunki itna saara dhyaan aur chinta aapke bhai ya behen ki taraf behti hai, aur aapke liye bahut kam bachta lagta hai.

Bharat se hue adhyayan batate hain ki bhai-behen aksar wah sthir, parde ke peechhe rehne wala sahaara ban jaate hain: wo jo follow-up chalaata rehta hai, jo roz ki zindagi ko jode rakhta hai, jiska apna tanaav kisi ko dikhta nahi kyunki wah kabhi shor nahi machaata. Agar yeh aap hain, to saaf-saaf kehna zaroori hai: aap jo karte hain wah maayne rakhta hai, aur uski aapko sach mein ek keemat chukaani padti hai.

Pyaar, apraadhbodh, chinta, naaraazgi aur dukh, ye sab aapke andar ek hi waqt par reh sakte hain. Ek pal apne bhai ya behen par gussa aana aur agle hi pal unke liye poori tarah dhaal ban jaana, yeh aapko bura bhai ya behen nahi banaata. Yeh aapko insaan banaata hai. Itne saalon tak koi bhi sirf naram bana nahi reh sakta.

Apraadhbodh sabse aam bhaavnaon mein se ek hai jo bhai-behen dhote hain. Is baat ka apraadhbodh ki aap hi wo hain jo theek chal raha hai. Apni zindagi, apni yojnaayein, apni jagah chaahne ka apraadhbodh. Un palon ka apraadhbodh jab aapka sabr khatam ho gaya aur aap jhalla uthe. Par apraadhbodh ek bhaavna hai, aapke charitra par koi faisla nahi. Yeh isliye aata hai ki aapko parwaah hai, isliye nahi ki aapne kuch galat kiya hai.

Yahan ek chupchaap dukh bhi ho sakta hai, aur uska naam liya jaana zaroori hai. Us aam bhai-behen wale rishte ke liye dukh jo aapko lagta tha aapko milega. Us parivar wali zindagi ke liye dukh jiski aapne kalpana ki thi, isse pehle ki chinta ne itni jagah gher li. Wah dukh jaayaz hai. Ise mehsoos karke aap koi naatak nahi kar rahe.

Jab bhaavnaayein zor maarein, tab khade hone ke liye yeh zameen hai. Aapne apne bhai ya behen ki ghabrahat paida nahi ki, aur aap use theek nahi kar sakte. Ek sach mein mushkil haalaat ke jawab mein aap jo mehsoos karte hain, wah is baat ki jaankari hai ki cheezein kitni bhaari rahi hain, aap mein koi kharaabi nahi.

Bhaavnaayein khud khatra nahi hain. Khatra yeh hai ki unhein rakhne ki koi jagah na ho. Band aur ankahi rehkar, ve naaraazgi ya sunnapan mein badal jaati hain. Kahin jaane ki jagah milne par, ve naram pad jaati hain.

Aap bhai ya behen hain. Aap aakhri bacha hua sahaara nahi hain, aur aap unke therapist nahi hain. Bhaari chinta ke saath ji rahe kisi se pyaar karne ka matlab unka poore waqt ka manager, unka har ghante bharosa dilaane wala, aur unki aapaatkaaleen seva, sab ek saath ban jaana nahi hai. Aapko unke saath ek insaan hone ki ijaazat hai, unke liye ek seva nahi.

Seemaayein thukraana nahi hain. Aap gehra pyaar bhi kar sakte hain aur yeh bhi keh sakte hain, "Main thodi der tumhare saath baith sakta hoon, aur main har baar apna poora din nahi chhod sakta." Ek sthir, dayaalu seema, apne aap ko jala dene aur phir tootkar gaayab ho jaane se kahin zyada der tikti hai. Ek seema hi wah hai jo aapko baar-baar saath khade rehne deti hai.

Madad ke baare mein ek naram sach bhi hai. Lagataar bharosa dilaana aur bachaane ke liye daud padna, samay ke saath, chinta ko shaant karne ki jagah use aur khuraak de sakta hai, kyunki dar kabhi yeh seekh nahi paata ki use jhela ja sakta hai. Shaant maujoodgi, aur aapke bhai ya behen ko dheere se chhote, sambhal sakne wale kadam khud uthaane dena, aksar unke liye sab kuch theek kar dene se zyada madad karta hai.

Apni zindagi chalaate rehna koi aisi aisho-aaraam ki cheez nahi jise aap kaat dein. Aapki padhai, aapke dost, aapki neend, wo cheezein jinhein aap bina kisi wajah ke bas isliye pasand karte hain ki aapko pasand hain, yahi wo cheezein hain jo aapko itna sthir rakhti hain ki aap kisi kaam ke rahein. Aap khaali pyaale se kisi ko nahi pila sakte, aur aapki bhalai aur aapke bhai ya behen ki bhalai, dono chupchaap ek-doosre se judi hain.

Aapko apne liye bhi sahaare ki zaroorat hone ki ijaazat hai. Apni zindagi ki hifaazat karna yeh hai ki poora parivar kaise tairta rehta hai, isse koi swaarthi bhaagna nahi. Ek bhai ya behen jo aaraam paaya hua hai aur jiski apni zameen mazboot hai, wah parivar ke liye usse kahin zyada keemti hai jo chupchaap khud ko zameen mein dhansa chuka ho.

Asli madad maujood hai, aur wah koi aakhri upaay nahi hai. Baatcheet wali therapy jo logon ko chhote-chhote kadmon mein, jisse ve darte hain uska saamna karna dheere se sikhaati hai, bachne ki jagah, is tarah ki chinta mein acche se kaam karti hai, chhoti umar walon aur badon, dono mein, aur ek doctor bata sakte hain ki aapke bhai ya behen ke liye kya theek baithta hai. Yeh koi munhjabaani dilaasa nahi hai. Yeh madad ke un roopon mein se ek hai jo sabse acche se samjhe hue aur sabse acche saboot wale hain.

Aapka kaam hausla dena hai, zor-zabardasti karna nahi. Aap apne bhai ya behen ko pehla kadam uthaane mein madad kar sakte hain, kisi doctor ya counsellor se milne mein, bina poore ilaaj ko apne hi kandhon par uthaaye. Yeh vichaar daalna, saath chalne ki peshkash karna, appointment book karne mein madad karna, yeh asli madad hai. Unka therapist ban jaana aapka kaam nahi hai, aur aap chaahenge bhi nahi ki ho.

Dheere se, un ishaaron par nazar rakhiye ki yeh kisi bure hafte se bada hai. Agar aapka bhai ya behen khaana ya sona band kar de, lagbhag poori tarah apne mein simat jaaye, rozmarra ki zindagi sambhaal na paaye, ya yeh kahe ki wah yahan nahi rehna chaahta, to ise gambheerta se lijiye. Khud ko nuksaan pahunchaane ki koi bhi baat, kadam uthaane layak hai, use talne ka intezaar karne layak nahi.

Agar aapka bhai ya behen, ya aap, kabhi asurakshit ya bebas mehsoos karein, to aap Tele-MANAS par 14416 par phone kar sakte hain, din ho ya raat, kisi bhi waqt, poore Bharat mein muft maansik sehat sahaare ke liye. Phone karne ke liye aapko kisi sankat ka hona zaroori nahi, aur sahi shabd jaanne bhi zaroori nahi. Aapko bas haath badhaana hai.

Apne liye bhi sahaara lijiye. Yeh koi baad mein sochne wali baat nahi hai. Koi counsellor, koi helpline, ya yahan tak ki ek imaandaar dost aapko ek jagah deta hai jahan aap thodi der ke liye bojh neeche rakh sakein. Apne bhai ya behen ki madad karna aur apna khyaal rakhna, ye ulti baatein nahi hain. Sahi tareeke se kiye jaayein, to ye ek hi kaam hain.